Today’s song is ‘Leaving on Your Mind’. This is a famous Country song written by Wayne Walker and Webb Pierce. The song was popularised by Joyce Smith in 1962. Patsy Cline stated that she was in Owen Bradley’s office one day, heard the record Smith made, and immediately wanted the song for herself. Patsy Cline wound up recording the song and releasing it in 1963. It was her last single before she died in a plane crash in March of that year. Unlike her earlier hits ‘Crazy’ and ‘I Fall to Pieces’, ‘Leaving on Your Mind’ was an unfortunate failure on the pop chart, where it stalled at Number 83. However, the song today remains a classic in Country music.
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During my own life as an individual and as a Probation Officer for 26 years, I experienced numerous people who found themselves in unhappy relationships. There inevitably came a time when they realised that something had to be done, and from that moment of decision only one thought preoccupied them; 'they had leaving on their mind’ as the only logical response to preserving their sanity, emotional stability, peace of mind, and occasionally, their physical safety.
Where the relationship is without children, some pain is undoubtedly avoided at the point of separation, but when children are part of the family equation, the decision to stay or go, to separate or divorce becomes much harder. There have been many husbands or wives who claimed to have stayed in a failed marriage ‘because of the children’s sake’.
Often, the decision to leave an unhappy and failed relationship has been postponed for many years until the children of the union have become older or have negotiated some important ‘next phase of development’. The person will often perceive their unselfish action as representing their parental duty. They will view sacrificing their own happiness ‘for the sake of the children’ as being the only responsible course of action open to them. Often, they may tell themselves or their reprieved partner, ‘I’ll leave you when the children have done their school examinations… or have gone to university… or have left home!”
When the threat to leave is ‘put on hold’ until a more suitable time in an unhappy relationship between husband and wife, an uneasy peace prevails between the couple during the intervening period. When, however, the children have left, that is when the person making the threat must declare their hand or be prepared to surrender their pride. They either leave as threatened or decide to stay; leaving them feeling that either their bluff has been called in the marital stakes or they have simply thrown in their hand and have continued to play at a losing marriage table.
If you are a person who has ‘leaving on your mind’, whether the leaving pertains to a relationship, an affair, or a marriage, a job, or any organisation or body, the sooner you come to a decision that meets your needs and which you can emotionally reconcile with, the better for all concerned. Those of indecisive mind will always be left stranded; often to feel that the last train has left the platform. However, if you are unfortunate enough to be in that situation, do not give all up, as that is not the case. There will always be another train arriving. It is never too late in the life of any individual to wake to a brighter morning.
Love and peace
Bill xxx