FordeFables
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    • Strictly for Adults Novels >
      • Rebecca's Revenge
      • Come Back Peter
    • Tales from Portlaw >
      • No Need to Look for Love
      • 'The Love Quartet' >
        • The Tannery Wager
        • 'Fini and Archie'
        • 'The Love Bridge'
        • 'Forgotten Love'
      • The Priest's Calling Card >
        • Chapter One - The Irish Custom
        • Chapter Two - Patrick Duffy's Family Background
        • Chapter Three - Patrick Duffy Junior's Vocation to Priesthood
        • Chapter Four - The first years of the priesthood
        • Chapter Five - Father Patrick Duffy in Seattle
        • Chapter Six - Father Patrick Duffy, Portlaw Priest
        • Chapter Seven - Patrick Duffy Priest Power
        • Chapter Eight - Patrick Duffy Groundless Gossip
        • Chapter Nine - Monsignor Duffy of Portlaw
        • Chapter Ten - The Portlaw Inheritance of Patrick Duffy
      • Bigger and Better >
        • Chapter One - The Portlaw Runt
        • Chapter Two - Tony Arrives in California
        • Chapter Three - Tony's Life in San Francisco
        • Chapter Four - Tony and Mary
        • Chapter Five - The Portlaw Secret
      • The Oldest Woman in the World >
        • Chapter One - The Early Life of Sean Thornton
        • Chapter Two - Reporter to Investigator
        • Chapter Three - Search for the Oldest Person Alive
        • Chapter Four - Sean Thornton marries Sheila
        • Chapter Five - Discoveries of Widow Friggs' Past
        • Chapter Six - Facts and Truth are Not Always the Same
      • Sean and Sarah >
        • Chapter 1 - 'Return of the Prodigal Son'
        • Chapter 2 - 'The early years of sweet innocence in Portlaw'
        • Chapter 3 - 'The Separation'
        • Chapter 4 - 'Separation and Betrayal'
        • Chapter 5 - 'Portlaw to Manchester'
        • Chapter 6 - 'Salford Choices'
        • Chapter 7 - 'Life inside Prison'
        • Chapter 8 - 'The Aylesbury Pilgrimage'
        • Chapter 9 - Sean's interest in stone masonary'
        • Chapter 10 - 'Sean's and Tony's Partnership'
        • Chapter 11 - 'Return of the Prodigal Son'
      • The Alternative Christmas Party >
        • Chapter One
        • Chapter Two
        • Chapter Three
        • Chapter Four
        • Chapter Five
        • Chapter Six
        • Chapter Seven
        • Chapter Eight
      • The Life of Liam Lafferty >
        • Chapter One: ' Liam Lafferty is born'
        • Chapter Two : 'The Baptism of Liam Lafferty'
        • Chapter Three: 'The early years of Liam Lafferty'
        • Chapter Four : Early Manhood
        • Chapter Five : Ned's Secret Past
        • Chapter Six : Courtship and Marriage
        • Chapter Seven : Liam and Trish marry
        • Chapter Eight : Farley meets Ned
        • Chapter Nine : 'Ned comes clean to Farley'
        • Chapter Ten : Tragedy hits the family
        • Chapter Eleven : The future is brighter
      • The life and times of Joe Walsh >
        • Chapter One : 'The marriage of Margaret Mawd and Thomas Walsh’
        • Chapter Two 'The birth of Joe Walsh'
        • Chapter Three 'Marriage breakup and betrayal'
        • Chapter Four: ' The Walsh family breakup'
        • Chapter Five : ' Liverpool Lodgings'
        • Chapter Six: ' Settled times are established and tested'
        • Chapter Seven : 'Haworth is heaven is a place on earth'
        • Chapter Eight: 'Coming out'
        • Chapter Nine: Portlaw revenge
        • Chapter Ten: ' The murder trial of Paddy Groggy'
        • Chapter Eleven: 'New beginnings'
      • The Woman Who Hated Christmas >
        • Chapter One: 'The Christmas Enigma'
        • Chapter Two: ' The Breakup of Beth's Family''
        • Chapter Three: From Teenager to Adulthood.'
        • Chapter Four: 'The Mills of West Yorkshire.'
        • Chapter Five: 'Harrison Garner Showdown.'
        • Chapter Six : 'The Christmas Dance'
        • Chapter Seven : 'The ballot for Shop Steward.'
        • Chapter Eight: ' Leaving the Mill'
        • Chapter Ten: ' Beth buries her Ghosts'
        • Chapter Eleven: Beth and Dermot start off married life in Galway.
        • Chapter Twelve: The Twin Tragedy of Christmas, 1992.'
        • Chapter Thirteen: 'The Christmas star returns'
        • Chapter Fourteen: ' Beth's future in Portlaw'
      • The Last Dance >
        • Chapter One - ‘Nancy Swales becomes the Widow Swales’
        • Chapter Two ‘The secret night life of Widow Swales’
        • Chapter Three ‘Meeting Richard again’
        • Chapter Four ‘Clancy’s Ballroom: March 1961’
        • Chapter Five ‘The All Ireland Dancing Rounds’
        • Chapter Six ‘James Mountford’
        • Chapter Seven ‘The All Ireland Ballroom Latin American Dance Final.’
        • Chapter Eight ‘The Final Arrives’
        • Chapter Nine: 'Beth in Manchester.'
      • 'Two Sisters' >
        • Chapter One
        • Chapter Two
        • Chapter Three
        • Chapter Four
        • Chapter Five
        • Chapter Six
        • Chapter Seven
        • Chapter Eight
        • Chapter Nine
        • Chapter Ten
        • Chapter Eleven
        • Chapter Twelve
        • Chapter Thirteen
        • Chapter Fourteen
        • Chapter Fifteen
        • Chapter Sixteen
        • Chapter Seventeen
      • Fourteen Days >
        • Chapter One
        • Chapter Two
        • Chapter Three
        • Chapter Four
        • Chapter Five
        • Chapter Six
        • Chapter Seven
        • Chapter Eight
        • Chapter Nine
        • Chapter Ten
        • Chapter Eleven
        • Chapter Twelve
        • Chapter Thirteen
        • Chapter Fourteen
      • ‘The Postman Always Knocks Twice’ >
        • Author's Foreword
        • Contents
        • Chapter One
        • Chapter Two
        • Chapter Three
        • Chapter Four
        • Chapter Five
        • Chapter Six
        • Chapter Seven
        • Chapter Eight
        • Chapter Nine
        • Chapter Ten
        • Chapter Eleven
        • Chapter Twelve
        • Chapter Thirteen
        • Chapter Fourteen
        • Chapter Fifteen
        • Chapter Sixteen
        • Chapter Seventeen
        • Chapter Eighteen
        • Chapter Nineteen
        • Chapter Twenty
        • Chapter Twenty-One
        • Chapter Twenty-Two
  • Celebrity Contacts
    • Contacts with Celebrities >
      • Journey to the Stars
      • Number 46
      • Shining Stars
      • Sweet Serendipity
      • There's Nowt Stranger Than Folk
      • Caught Short
      • A Day with Hannah Hauxwell
    • More Contacts with Celebrities >
      • Judgement Day
      • The One That Got Away
      • Two Women of Substance
      • The Outcasts
      • Cars for Stars
      • Going That Extra Mile
      • Lady in Red
      • Television Presenters
  • Thoughts and Musings
    • Bereavement >
      • Time to clear the Fallen Leaves
      • Eulogy for Uncle Johnnie
    • Nature >
      • Why do birds sing
    • Bill's Personal Development >
      • What I'd like to be remembered for
      • Second Chances
      • Roots
      • Holidays of Old
      • Memorable Moments of Mine
      • Cleckheaton Consecration
      • Canadian Loves
      • Mum's Wisdom
      • 'Early life at my Grandparents'
      • Family Holidays
      • 'Mother /Child Bond'
      • Childhood Pain
      • The Death of Lady
      • 'Soldiering On'
      • 'Romantic Holidays'
      • 'On the roof'
      • Always wear clean shoes
      • 'Family Tree'
      • The importance of poise
      • 'Growing up with grandparents'
    • Love & Romance >
      • Dancing Partner
      • The Greatest
      • Arthur & Guinevere
      • Hands That Touch
    • Christian Thoughts, Acts and Words >
      • Reuben's Naming Ceremony
      • Love makes the World go round
      • Walks along the Mirfield canal
  • My Wedding
  • My Funeral
  • Audio Downloads
    • Audio Stories >
      • Douglas the Dragon
      • Sleezy the Fox
      • Maw
      • Midnight Fighter
      • Action Annie
      • Songs & Music >
        • Douglas the Dragon Play >
          • Our World
          • You On My Mind
        • The Ballad of Sleezy the Fox
        • Be My Life
    • 'Relaxation Rationale' >
      • Relax with Bill
    • The Role of a Step-Father
  • My Singing Videos
    • Christmas Songs & Carols
  • Bill's Blog
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    • Thought For Today
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March 31st, 2018.

31/3/2018

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Thought for today:
"Despite all the advances in car manufacture and heavy vehicles such as lorries and buses over the past fifty years, they don't make drivers today that can match the skill of drivers then. In my young days, a driver of an articulated lorry could spin on a sixpence while eating a jam butty.

For three years during the early 1960s, I drove taxis between 10.00 pm and 1.00 am to earn some extra money to save for my bottom drawer. I drove for Charlies' Taxis, who had a small hut near the old Cleckheaton Bus Station. My wage was one shilling and thruppence per hour, plus any tips the customer gave us. There was no taxi licence or age requirement then as far as Charlie was concerned, so long as you could handle his Cortina vehicles. He had three taxis, the newest being seven years old and the oldest, twelve years. The longest-serving taxi driver got the best car and the newcomer got the worst vehicle.

Charlie lived his life (or rather got by) and operated his three-car taxi business on a shoe-string budget. None of his cars was ever road worthy and God only knows what would have happened had some taxi driver or passenger incurred a serious or fatal accident, as Charlie had no medical insurance to cover that eventuality. Why I've known him get prosecuted a number of times for having no car insurance or road tax. As for 'making do', unless the tyres on the taxis had done 50,000 miles, they were staying. Many were the time when I did a complete U-turn in the road on bald tyres. One passenger once berated me saying,'Hey, mate. I paid to get straight home to Heckmondwike, not have a spin on the Waltzer!' I even recall arriving back to the taxi hut one night it had been snowing, and as I drove through the bus station, three of my four car tyres were so bald that they had each caught fire!

All drivers were bolder and some might say, dafter in those days. I was even told by an old resident of Haworth who was in his nineties that buses have been known to drive up the steep cobbled incline of Main Street in the snow as a matter of course. I also heard of the Haworth bus driver learner-test. When a learner driver was able to travel across the narrow route of Black Moor Road and pass an oncoming bus on a snowy day; only then could he be considered as ready to take his standard test, and he'd be allowed a provisional licence until he got more advanced.

These modern drivers don't know they're born today!" William Forde: March 1st, 2018.
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March 30th, 2018.

30/3/2018

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​Thought for today:
Today remembers that day 2000 years ago when Jesus died on the cross so that we might know how to live. He loved every person and charges us with expressing our love towards each other. He forgave his persecutors and asks us to forgive in turn, those who don't always side with us and our way of life. This is the Good Friday message. Some might say this message is the same as the one below but merely expressed differently.
  

'Walk with me through life and my dog will accompany you to the ends of the earth because he loves me as much as any creature is capable of loving; as much as I love you, and as much as we love God.' 

A very Happy Easter everyone."William Forde: March 30th, 2018.
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March 29th, 2018.

29/3/2018

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Thought for today:
"Some people behave like drama queens. They first overreact to something they don't like and after making a great fuss and palaver, they resume their more normal 'on edge' disposition, at the ready to flare up again at the next small spark of disagreement.

In short, they like to make storms in a teacup and then complain about getting splashed (mad). They are their own worst enemies and yet, this type of behaviour isn't confined to nasty people alone. I know many a good person who cannot seem to exist unless they are at the centre of a perpetual crisis; usually one of their own making or design. There will always be a problem in their life or on the horizon because the maelstrom of their mind will always look for one!

I recall hearing of a couple of long-term elderly residents in an Old Folk's Home. Neither of the two had spoken to one another for many years, yet they daily entered into battle; talking about each other disparagingly to other residents and overall pulling the other person down. Despite this long silence of over a decade's duration, neither could remember what had been the cause of their original fall out. Their daily disagreeable discourse continued to be carried out for a full fourteen years and only stopped when one of the two male residents died in their sleep, aged ninety-two.

I was told that while no apparent remorse was initially expressed by the surviving protagonist, he nevertheless entered into a permanent state of bereavement after the funeral until he also died some three weeks later. It was thought that the death of one had taken away the life purpose of the other.

Life is too short and is far too sweet to waste in quarrelsome mood and cantankerous mind. Life is for living and enjoying to the full. Few of us truly appreciate this great gift we have when we wake up on a morning to face the day ahead. We think we do, we say we do, but we truly don't until death stares us in the face. It one of mankind's greatest ironies that we never fully appreciate what we have until we don't have it anymore.

The loudest wake-up call I ever got was to be told that I had a terminal illness over four years ago; and yet it is one of the best things that ever happened to me. I know that most of you reading this post will consider me as somebody who has flipped his lid; a man living in cloud cuckoo land, but you could not be more wrong!

Whilst, during that four years I have continued to breathe, I have been able to experience every second as a 'precious moment'. Healthy people with normal life-expectancy experience each second, minute, hour, day, week, month, year they breathe as being 'a second: a minute, an hour, a day, a week, a month, a year', (some good, some fair, and some bad); whereas every second I continue to live and breathe, I experience as being 'precious'. It is as though God has turned the world upside down by giving me a quality of life and appreciation that normal healthy folk can never know.

​It's a wonderful world that God gave us. Have a good day out there." William Forde: March 29th, 2018.
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March 28th, 2018.

28/3/2018

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”Thought for today:
"You must take responsibility for your own life. You can't keep blaming someone else for your disappointments. Life is really about seizing the moment and moving on, not looking back in permanent regret. Do not let the past steal your present. No one has ever been known to get a life looking backwards instead of forward, where one's future lies. Let the past bury its own dead; you've got your future to look forward to!

If you want to love life for all its worth, you must first learn to value it. Look always in the direction where 'positivism' is to be found. This requires one being constantly channelled into an energy force that is determined to do good. Everything around us is made up of energy and therefore, to attract all things positive in our lives, starts with yourself giving off positive energy.

Positive people believe in self as well as others. I am always doing things that others tell me I cannot do. That is how I get them done. I will not be defined by what others think of me or by 'what I did,' as opposed to 'what I do.' I refuse to be prodded, pressurised and pushed by problems when being led by my dreams makes me a more content individual. In the final analysis, there are only two ways to live one's life. One way is to believe that nothing is a miracle and the other is to believe that everything is! Looking around at the birth of a child and all the mystery of nature and its four seasons, I much prefer to believe the latter.

So look forward to tomorrow by being purposeful in all you do today. One of the biggest mistakes in life is to travel through it without purpose or self-belief. If we are wise, we will always have a goal to pursue. The trouble with not having a goal to direct you is akin to spending your life running up and down the football field and never scoring!" March 28th, 2018
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March 27th, 2018

27/3/2018

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Thought for today:
"My dear father died 27 years ago today. Of all the good things he accomplished in life, the best thing he ever did was to marry my mum! In many ways, my mother was the opposite to dad, and the best way to understand the kind of man he was is to know my mother well and to ascribe to dad all of her opposite character traits, with the exception of four which they shared in equal abundance; sheer goodness, generosity, industriousness and love of their children.

All that I am and ever hope to be, I owe to my parents, but mostly my mother. While it required both mum and dad to give me life, my mother gave me soul and infused me with the belief that anything is possible if you never disown or disgrace yourself, your background or your God. I was taught to honour all three by my mother. My dad who had been reared during a time when a man's word was his bond added, 'Honour your word' as the fourth commandment of the Forde family. The first three children of the family were born in Southern Ireland and the next four were born in West Yorkshire. As the photo above shows, I have always been bonnier than the next two girls in the chain of command.

Next month will be the anniversary of my dear mother's death who died at the early age of 64 years. At least, Dad could once say he bested her when he reached 75 years. Although their great grandchildren never knew them, they meet them on every occasion that they come across one or more of the Forde clan. Some even see their features daily in the image of their children, though they may not recognize it as readily as myself and siblings.

Although a non-academic who left school to work as soon as she entered her early teens, my mum was nevertheless a woman of substance who taught all seven of her children the finest lesson of all; to look out for each other as long as we live. Her education may have been unfinished, but her wisdom and depth of thought was profound and started each of her children in their journey of life along a wholesome road. She was a born storyteller or as others may prefer to have described her, 'a teller of tall truths' and I'm sure that my sixty-seven published books are down to her indirect influence. Dad also left school before his education was complete to enter the market of work. He never experienced the same close family bond with his parents as mum did, and for the whole of his life, he never came across as being a tactile person. It was not until after mum died that he started to become more expressive and was prepared to show his more vulnerable side.

Mum always encouraged the honest expression of one's feelings at the moment of their birth, whereas dad rarely revealed what he was thinking. She never thought to cry to be unmanly and believed that tears are the raw expression of the bravest of thoughts. I only ever saw my dad cry once, after I told him that I was getting a divorce. I never quite knew if he was crying for me or the possible loss of my soul and slight to Catholic Church orthodoxy.

Mum also said to think before speaking as one can never retrieve the spoken word nor get back the stone after the throw. One of her nicest pieces of wisdom though was when she told us to walk gently through the world as we are not always aware when we tread upon the fragile feelings of others. She also said that we should know the earth's beauty all the days of our life. Dad never came across as being the romantic type, although mum said that he would cycle thirty miles each way midweek when they were courting, just to see her in Portlaw where they went walking the fields and meadows.

I remember the last time I saw mum looking out of the hospital window from her bed in Staincliffe Hospital the day before she died. I had just spent an hour visiting her and said that I'd visit again tomorrow. She was smiling. My last image of dad was to see him in tremendous pain in his flat in Liversedge. He had seemingly had a stomach cancer for at least two years before he died from it, and had never once sought medical assistance for it. To dad, there were always people worse than himself who needed the attention of the medical services more.

My mum wasn't faultless by any stretch of the imagination, but by God, she was a good person and a loving mother. I would best describe her as being a perfect example of how to find oneself and remain happy and content with the person found. Through the very example of hers and dad's existence, they taught me the two most treasured lessons that any set of parents could teach their child. Mum taught me 'how to live happily' and dad taught me 'how to die with dignity'. Mum's secret was simple; never keep your love distant from others and always keep a smile close by. Dad's secret was to always stay close to God and dignity will stay with you until the end.

My father also was far from faultless. He cared too much about 'image' and how one presented themselves to the neighbours. His shoes were always polished to the point that one could see one's face look back at you, whereas mums would be frequently scuffed. My mother's favourite taunt of dad was, 'I've known murderers, Paddy, who could see the reflection of their crimes as they were committing them in their highly polished shoes!' Another favourite taunt of mums was, 'If only the neighbours could see and hear you now, Paddy. They'd soon see the gentleman you're not!'

My parents were no different to lots of other parents of the time with many children to care and provide for. Their marriages could be separated into three parts; the loving years, the practical years and the reconciling years when all the children have grown and flown the nest. Being their firstborn, I enjoyed their most loving years, which made my grounding as happy and as emotionally stable as it could have been. By the time that the youngest two children were born, I'd left home and rows between them grew more frequent and intensive. They were never violent arguments they had; they merely demonstrated to the other the quickest way of throwing a pan across the room, or how to smash a pot against a wall into a thousand pieces!

I often wondered how mum and dad ever managed to get together in the first place, with them being so dissimilar in character traits. Dad was shy and non-expressive; a man who didn't mix easily, whereas mum could make friends with any stranger or the first beggar she met. My mother's greatest criticism of dad was that he didn't dance, enjoy a drink, sing or have fun. Dad never drunk apart from the odd half on family occasions; largely because his own father drank too much. Dad never danced in his life, (except on the football field when he played soccer for Ireland), and although mum might never have heard him sing, there were two songs that he always sang in the bathroom when getting a bath, 'Some Enchanted Evening' and 'Sweet Sixteen.' Myself and sisters Mary and Eileen would giggle as we listened to him outside the bathroom door.

Dad was 'too religious by half' according to mum. Whereas he would always be knelt down in his pew on a Sunday morning, a good ten minutes before Mass started, Mum always arrived five minutes late and left five minutes early to have a quick smoke outside. Mum always said, 'An hour's sermon is long enough for anyone to get to heaven. I've things to do! Things to do!' As for tobacco, dad hated smoking whereas mum was a chain smoker. Everytime mum lit up a cigarette in the house, dad would open one of the windows, whatever the season. It was often like living in an open field.

Given all of these differences between my parents, I once asked mum why she had married dad. Her reply was, 'Billy, apart from being pregnant with you at the time, how could I not marry him? He was handsome and played football for Kilkenny and the Irish soccer squad; and besides, I was ready for leaving home: and I loved him!'

God bless you Dad from your oldest child, Billy. I only knew you to sing two songs in the whole of your life, while mum would sing all day long, every day. Your two songs were, 'Some Enchanted Evening' and 'Sweet Sixteen'. I have sung 'Some Enchanted Evening' this morning for you and will sing 'Sweet Sixteen for you this evening to celebrate your life as head of the Forde Family.x"William Forde: March 27th, 2018.

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https://youtu.be/9YXJBZWRbFc

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March 26th, 2018.

26/3/2018

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Thought for today:
"While I am a great believer in the process of 'kiss and make up,' there are some reconciliations that I could never feel quite comfortable with.

For instance; if someone has been a lifelong foe, and for whatever stated reasons they suddenly start snuggling up to me affectionately and want to make peace. That is a time when my innate suspicions and sense of mistrust would begin to rise and I would find myself in danger of being highly sceptical of their true motives.

I would find this baser nature of mine placing the power of 'positivism' and 'negativism' in direct conflict with each other. Momentarily, I would find myself overriding my better conscience and my belief in the saying, 'everyone deserves a second chance.' Then, just as Satan smiled at the prospect of securing himself another soul convert, I'd hear my late mother's voice in the background and would find myself having been pulled back towards the gates of goodness once more from the jaws of hell.

Mum would say, 'Stay positive, Billy and believe. Believe in truth, love, sincerity, trust, self and God. Believe in these things and all things will become possible; even a hungry fox comforting a poorly chicken.'

In later life, one of my two most popular children's books that sold over 50,000 copies and which the late Princess Diana asked me to send her to read to the young Princes, William and Harry when they were respectively aged 9 and 7 years, was called 'Sleezy the Fox'. The book theme is 'Second chances' and the story plot involves the taming of a wild fox to the extent that the fox finishes up comforting poorly chickens instead of eating them!

In fact, the more I think about things, the more I am coming to fully appreciate just how much our past plays an active part and strong influence in most of what we do today and go on to do in later life; and although past, present and future are interdependent in the degree of influence they exercise over our mind and body, the three dimensions of our life remain connected from cradle to grave.

For instance, over the past two months, I have been engaging in daily singing practice to improve my lung functioning (which incidentally continues to gradually improve).

The strange thing is that all of the forty plus songs I have so far sung has a particular memory association in my mind that is connected to my past. This goes back to songs that my grandmother sang 70 years ago and my mother, father and uncles sang as far back as 50 years ago; along with places I've been to, films I saw as a young boy, and things I did as a young man.

It looks like we presently reside in the skeleton form of our past, and our experiences provide us with a bit of fresh meat on the bone. And, when we die and are buried, our flesh will gradually depart our body once more, leaving us a buried skeleton of memories we once held in another lifetime." William Forde: March 26th, 2018.


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March 25th, 2018

25/3/2018

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Thought for today:
"They do say that the best teachers to learn from are those tutors who show you where to look and not tell you what to look at; a teacher who seeks not to interpret the meaning of the image you see there.

Sixty-four years ago, I first came across the true meaning of meditation and relaxation after having incurred a bad traffic accident and being told that I'd never walk again. During this period when Western medicine offered me no realistic hope of ever being able to walk again I turned to Eastern methods and disciplines, lots of prayers, and I also I learned about the power of the imagination and how harnessing one's images and using one's visualisation can make the body do unbelievable things.

Twenty years later, I first became acquainted with Rogerian counselling; a 'client-centred' approach which is 'non-directive and non-judgemental.' This is a therapy where the client is cured through a process of finding and developing self-love. While most observers who are unfamiliar with this process will only see and hear a lot of 'ums' and 'ahs' from the counseller, I know that this approach can and has worked for many people who are prepared to undergo long-term therapy and who need to be 'listened to' more than 'reasoned with' or advised.

As a Probation Officer for most of my working life, I was naturally acquainted with the work of Sigmund Freud in my training, and while I found many of his psycho-analytical theories bizarre, I did find some of his work upon neurosis very pertinent. I later learned that often the only way to cure someone of a particular neurosis which badly hampered their life was to teach them to substitute it with a more innocuous neurosis.

Then, one night I was watching late night television and onto my screen came a rather inebriated psychiatrist called Ronald David Laing. This was in the early days of channel four and it was not unusual to see and hear all manner of things late into the early morning discussion programmes. Although Laing was half drunk at the time of his television discussion, he spoke a remarkable lot of sense. Laing appealed to me because he was a rebel; a revolutionary who held views which ran counter to the psychiatric orthodoxy of the day. He took the expressed feelings of his patients to be valid descriptions of their lived experiences rather than mere symptoms of some underlying disorder. For example, any patient who believed that they were King Henry the Fourth reincarnated was approached and spoken to by him as though they were King Henry the Fourth and not some nut case. Laing knew that if the mind led one to believe something unfactual, then it was perfectly natural for the body to live out that experience. He also propounded the theory of 'Reframing'; taking a problem situation and looking at it anew. For example, don't get upset if you are awake all night and sleep all day; instead think, 'Just look at how much I can get done in the early hours when everyone else is asleep and I can get on unhindered without telephone and other people distractions.'

Then, I discovered the work of Albert Ellis who worked in the field of Emotional Disturbance and before very long I found myself being fascinated by the Behaviourists of the day. The Behaviourist approach, although largely frowned upon in England in the early 1970s, appealed to me tremendously because it was a method that concerned itself with changing the effect of a particular form of problem behaviour as opposed to finding the cause and just talking about it! While naturally being interested in 'the cause' of any particular problem behaviour, it was this pragmatic approach of 'What can I do to change this situation/behaviour' which led me to specialise in Behaviour Modification.

Most behavioural work and modification of behaviour necessitates the use of Relaxation Training as an aid towards effecting change and so I became a Relaxation Instructor. Over the years ahead, I became wholly eclectic in my working methods as I derived ideas, styles, approaches from a diverse range of sources, theories and disciplines of working; selecting what I considered to be best practice from this and that along the way. It was this particular eclectic approach which gradually led me on to found the discipline and process of 'Anger Management' which mushroomed across the English speaking world within a matter of two years in the early 70s. It is highly refreshing to know that literally millions of people have been significantly helped through 'Anger Management' methods and processes.

All of this is to simply say that there is no 'one way' or 'no best way' for all varieties of problems and all types of people. Whereas one person responds better to 'this' approach, another will respond better to 'that.' While one person will more willingly accept the philosophy of one worker, another will instantly reject that of another. So the next time that you hear any purist advocate a universal panacea to counter one condition or another, take my advice and take a wide berth.

Consider: if you were arranging a meal to cater for a wide mixture of people from all four corners of the world next week; some meat lovers, others vegetarians and some vegans, you wouldn't dream of offering them all the same food to eat, would you? And even were you to persuade them all to partake, you couldn't possibly make them chew and digest what you'd served or stop them throwing up later on!

One of the most advantageous methods I have ever practised was strangely enough, 'Listening to the person, and in particular, the words they choose to describe their problem situation.' Why this is so important is that their very own words will indicate the type of working method that will prove the most effective in overcoming their problem area (psychiatric: psychological: emotional: or practical).

It works like this. Every single person has a general philosophical approach and set of beliefs. Some people are more of the 'thinking type', some the 'emotional type' and some the 'practical/doing type'. Every person's response pattern is comprised of what they 'think, feel and do', but is predominant in one of these three areas. If the method offered to the client by the worker doesn't match their philosophical beliefs, the problematic person will not be suitable or indeed be likely to carry out the treatment method. When method offered and the person being helped match, you have their instant appeal and they are more than likely to stick with the treatment method. The best method for a 'thinking person' with a problem is a mental approach carried out by a psychiatrist or cognitive behaviour therapist. The best method for a 'feeling person' is a psychological one carried out by a psychologist, counsellor or therapist. The best method for a 'doing person' is a task-orientated one (ie engaging in any activity that is known to change attitudes and behaviour such as any sport, walking, boxing, wood carving etc. etc.).

How the worker knows which type of method is appropriate to the person with the problem that is more likely to be philosophically accepted by them and followed, is by 'listening' to the person describe their own problem situation. Three different problem types are all at danger of killing themselves. When asked to describe their problem situation in their own words one might say, 'I often have these bad thoughts and I frequently find myself thinking about killing myself!' The next problem type might respond by saying, 'I feel so bad all the time that I feel like ending it all!' The third type of person may just threaten to kill themselves and then go on to do so!

Different horses for different courses, but it saves so much valuable and unwasted time of both worker and client backing the wrong runner!" William Forde: March 25th, 2018.
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March 24th, 2018.

24/3/2018

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Thought for today:
"There is no path to happiness; happiness is the path! Some pursue happiness and never find it while some who have it, cherish and appreciate its value in our lives and sense of wellbeing.The road to lasting happiness will not be found searching the highways and byways made by mankind. It cannot be found up the highest mountain, at the bottom of the biggest ocean or down the deepest wishing well.

The attainment of happiness cannot be bought, manufactured or conjured up by mental aberration. It is not tangible yet can be held. It has no shape yet determines the shape and manner of our disposition.

And yet, the road to happiness is accessible to all who walk in peace, love and understanding. It is not the mountain we need to conquer, but yourself; for it is only when there is no enemy within, that no enemy outside one can ever hurt." William Forde 24th March 2018.
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March 23rd, 2018.

23/3/2018

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Thought for today;
"I was recently reading about some people who are currently unemployed and in receipt of more benefit than many full-time workers earn for a full-time job. I must say, in my book that's far more attractive a proposition for getting below the minimum wage for doing a shitty job!

Now, given the parlous state of the economy and the lack of work which pays above the minimum-wage level, I don't blame anyone who finds themselves unemployed through no fault of their own. However, I do blame the Government past and present for allowing any able-bodied person to receive unemployment benefit without being required to do some community work in return for at least three days labour in every five-day working week.

Fifty years ago, I arrived in Toronto, Canada in the bleak of winter. I was amazed to see how many men there were clearing the snow off the roads and highways during a time of high snow drifts in temperatures of minus 20 degrees. I later learned that over half of the workers were those who were claiming unemployment benefit and who were giving their time in repayment of government benefits; not voluntarily I would add, but nevertheless ungrudgingly! These benefit claimants worked alongside and among the regular government salaried road-maintenance workers and all wore the same indistinguishable uniforms. At the time, the Canadian Government argued that 'Nobody of able-bodied means gets anything in return for doing nothing!' I also recall that the Canadian philosophy of the time believed that maintaining the work ethos of a man enabled one to maintain self-respect.

Just think about all those Government/Local Government jobs that go undone due to lack of finance. Indeed, the entire able-bodied and currently unemployed workforce could be gainfully employed filling in millions of potholes in our roads and renovating hundreds of thousands of abandoned housing stock; all under the supervision of paid council employees of course. And if there were any left, they could also visit the infirm and elderly who no longer receive anything more than a flying visit from their council carers daily lasting twenty minutes maximum.

Of course, many will no doubt think that such an idea is not as preferable to funding more paid workers in our Government Services (from money we are told we do not have), and the trade unions would no doubt have something to say about it and start an up cry of 'slave labour'. I'd certainly try out the Canadian model on all able-bodied unemployed who have no chance of getting a job in the current economic climate.

What a marvellous idea! I reckon that we could do with a dose of that rationale in our country today; don't you? 'Hey mate, don't drop your litter around here. It's not a circus! Get it bagged!'" William Forde: March 23rd, 2018

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March 22nd, 2018

22/3/2018

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Thought for today
"Don't allow your doubts to be responsible for missing your boat. Our lives are defined largely by opportunities, the ones we take and even the ones we let slip by. Your big opportunity may be where you are now, looking you in the face, but you refuse to see it. It is so easy to instantly disregard an opportunity that comes your way, simply because it is dressed in overalls and appears too much hard work to follow up. 

No successful person will ever complain of insufficient opportunities; they prepare themselves to seize every chance that comes their way.They are the ones who have made it an art of life to catch all the good within their reach. They realise that good opportunities are seldom presented, but are so easily lost if we let them slip through our net. As a society, I frequently feel that we place too much store on one's ability, which although good, is of little worth without the opportunity to employ it.

How many times have you heard of the man or woman who had the opportunity of securing true love, but by the time they realised it was there, it had gone; their indecisiveness enabled the catch to slip through their grasp as they'd dithered with their destiny. Their sad lament in later years as they pass their evenings alone with their dog or cat as their only companion is to console themselves with the memory of 'what might have been', but never was: 'There was another life I might have had, a happier and more fulfilling life, but having missed my moment, I missed the boat and I am having this one instead.' 

So do not miss out on the opportunities that come your way, for more often than not, they pass but once and rarely return. As the Austrian writer, Baroness Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach once remarked, 'When the time comes in which one could, the time has passed in which one can.'" William Forde: March 22nd, 2018.
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March 21st, 2018.

21/3/2018

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"Thought for today:
"Today is the First day of Spring; the anniversary of my father's birthday who died in 1991, aged 75 years (my current age). Of all the things that I could say to his credit, including the fact that he played international soccer for Ireland, none comes to mind more readily than the fact that he was a good man of humble mannerisms, Christian beliefs and simple ways, who always put his family first. He was one of the most independent and stubborn of men I ever knew. He was a man of very few close friends, and his closest was his brother Billy.The two were inseparable before their marriages.

Dad was brought up in the poorest of circumstances in County Kilkenny, Ireland and started work at an early age when other boys of his year were still being educated at school.  He was a man who always did whatever he did in his life to the best of his capabilities. He never considered any kind of work to be beneath him, and bringing a wage home for his wife and seven children was always his first priority.

I recall as a teenager when my father was a miner at a pit in Birstall and his workmates had voted to go on strike, my father was the only man in the pit who braved the picket line to earn his day's wage. One of his few sayings that I can remember of his was, ' Principles are for the rich without children and mouths to feed!' It says much about dad that the other miners never held this action against him when they returned to work, because he commanded their respect as being an honourable man. Despite myself going on to become the youngest trade union shop steward in Great Britain at the age of 18 years, I could understand how a proud man who was concerned for the welfare of his wife and children could stifle his silent tears as he crossed a picket line of working comrades to earn a day's wage.
 
No more can one expect of any man, father and husband. The day that dad was born, my father brought the first day of spring into the world. I love you Dad. I miss you. 

I only ever heard you sing two songs in your life, Dad. The only time I ever knew you to sing was when you were getting a bath after a hard day's work. I would often listen at the bathroom door, and along with my sisters, Mary and Eileen, we would giggle and quietly laugh. We only heard you sing two songs in your life; 'Sweet Sixteen' and 'Some Enchanted Evening' from the film 'South Pacific'. Allow me to sing one of your favourite songs today, Dad on behalf of all seven of your children. We may not have always understood you and the things you did, but we always loved and respected you. Happy birthday, Dad, on what would have been your 102nd, birthday. Love from Billy and all my siblings, Mary, Eileen, Patrick, Peter, Michael and Susan; and if you and mum eventually ended up in the same place, I'm sure she'll be wishing you happy birthday too.': William Forde: March 21st, 2018.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=9YXJBZWRbFc

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March 20th, 2018.

20/3/2018

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​Thought for today:
"Today, 'The Force's Sweetheart,' Dame Vera Lynn celebrates her 101st birthday. All the very best, Dame Vera. There can be but few people alive today, who in their lifetime meant so much to so many. Fewer still are the numbers who not only inspired wounded soldiers in the trenches of foreign fields during the 'Second World War', but who was capable of keeping the memory alive of the England they so much loved as they fought for the freedoms they valued so highly and which we cherish today; an England that so many would never live to see again. Indeed; you came to represent what England meant to so many men fighting overseas and your song, 'We'll Meet Again' will live down the ages and will still be sung in another 101 years!

From over 800 famous names who read from one of my books in children's schools between 1990 and 2000, your name will always stand out among 'the greats' as far as I'm concerned. I remember how we arranged to read to the children of the primary school in Ditchling (where you live), towards the end of the 1990's. Unfortunately, a heart attack I suffered prevented me attending that reading of 'Robin and the Rubicelle Fusiliers' (a story of London in the Blitz of which I subsequently arranged for every boy and girl in the school to receive a free copy of). I have never been one to save autographs, but I will always treasure your signature upon my own copy of the book along with other autographed momentoes you have sent me over the years.

While I am aware of so many kind and selfless gestures you have made over the years, I will never forget a Mirfield friend of mine whose life you once brought gladness into. He was an elderly man who lived alone and you were his heroine throughout the 'Second World War' years. He admired you so much that many years earlier he's cut out a picture of you from a newspaper and framed it in pride of place above his fireplace. When he fell ill, I wrote to you and told you his story and about his undying admiration for you. Your response was to send him the original photo of his newspaper cutting personally autographed to him. It was one of the iconic photos of you in uniform and it was the only copy according to your letter to him. That man is dead now, but thanks to your generosity of spirit, you provided him with so much happiness through your selfless gesture before he passed away.

I was over the moon to receive a signed copy of the CD that was released by you to celebrate your 100th birthday last March 2017. Today you have reached 101, Vera. What a wonderful age to have attained and what a wonderful and selfless life you have had. You are a credit to humanity and will remain a British icon into the next century.

I have recently been practising singing a few songs for my Facebook contacts, and unsurprisingly, my choice of song has reflected the times in which I grew up. In those days, my own mum had you at the top of her favourite singer list (as did the whole of England). If only she knew then that one day we would become friends, she would have been immensely proud. As I've spent the past month selecting songs that meant so much to me, Dame Vera, surprisingly, the singers that have represented my past more than anyone else were you, Dean Martin and Elvis Presley in descending order.

​A very happy 101st birthday to you Dame Vera. May your special day be filled with much happiness, peace, love and generosity. I could never personally hope to ever repay the consideration and generosity of spirit you have given me over the past twenty-five years, but please accept this humble rendition of one of your songs that inspired the British Nation during those dark years of 1939-45. Love from your friend, Bill xxx"William Forde: March 20th, 2018.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aWYuxF3xsO0

​For anyone wishing to read about my contact with Dame Vera please log on to
http://www.fordefables.co.uk/going-that-extra-mile.html

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March 19th, 2018

19/3/2018

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Thought for today:
"Character consists not of the number of times one is knocked down, but of getting back up. The true measure of a person's character isn't how one lives with success, but how one reacts to the experience of failure, and in particular what one does on the third and fourth knock-back?

On every occasion in my life when something uninviting and unhelpful has occurred, my mind has always gone to those wise words of my mother which she often spoke to me.

'There may be many people who are capable of putting you down, Billy, but only you can keep yourself down.'

As a young man in my early twenties, I had a good and very wise boxing instructor. While I could never really box with any great skill, I engaged in the sport at an amateur level in order to improve my balance, very much as I took up horse riding; having one leg a few inches shorter than the other as the result of a traffic accident. I often spun around too fast and lost my footing.

My instructor would constantly remind me as I entered the ring, 'Don't forget Bill, however many times he knocks you down, if you get up every time within ten seconds, he can never knock you out!'

I guess that my mother and my boxing trainer, though one be stranger to the other, most certainly had a meeting of minds along the way!

Over the past five years since I was diagnosed with a terminal blood cancer, I have met and had contact with so many people who suffer daily with no reasonable diagnosis that they will ever improve. Many of them are destined for an early death, and some can realistically expect a horrendously painful one; given the nature of their cancer. I am sure that the vast majority are frightened of dying and yet they carry on with their daily lives positively, engaging in the lives of others and the activities of the community. Such people are truly brave. I remember being once told by a seasoned soldier who was in active service for 21 years; where colleagues of his were killed and mutilated regularly. He told me that he was scared stiff every time he went on a mission to take out the enemy. It was this very fear he held which denoted the action he involved himself in as 'bravery.' This reminded me of my mother telling me, "Billy, only cowards should ever be awarded medals for bravery.'

So every time you fear something yet face your fear, remember that you are exercising a bravery that the competent, confident, accomplished and the fearless do not have and can never possess! My one piece of advice to all persons who are having to cope with terminal cancer is never to forget to spend the remainder of your days 'living your life' instead of focusing on your death, and thereby wasting what little precious time you have left to spend with your loved ones." William Forde: March 19th, 2018
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March 18th, 2018.

18/3/2018

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Thought for today:
With all the recent changeable weather, I can't wait for spring to come to both the gardens and allotments instead of merely being a date on our kitchen calendars and teasing one with brief glimpses of what 'should be' instead of 'what is'. As the Sioux warrior chief, Sitting Bull is once said to have remarked,'Behold, my friends, the spring has come; the earth has gladly received the embraces of the sun, and we shall soon see the results of their love.'

While my health has been as stable as it possibly could have been over the past six months, I have only been spared further pneumonia, death threatening bugs and emergency hospital admissions and treatment because I have mostly stayed at home inside, keeping warm for most of this period and greatly restricted my contact with human viruses (that essentially means avoiding human contact for the most part). Our allotment offers me release from this house prison that contains my old body nine months of each good year, and spring just won't allow me to stay in the house any longer than needs must. I can't wait to get out and breathe the air deeply again and sing with the birds and the plants in our allotment.

​I usually write two books a year, health permitting, and they are written and published during the cold winter months. When spring arrives, I put down my pen and do not take it up again until autumn has come and gone.

Spring brings perpetual astonishment to me and with its promised coming. I am calm again. Nature paints spring a colourful glow and make me forget that anything as cold and harsh as winter ever existed. It carries the hope of rebirth and new life in its ground, the love of life sleeps in its cool breeze and hope abounds when the sweet music of the birds fills the air and blades of moorland grass beneath lovers lying are crushed in an amorous embrace.

The Bohemian-Austrian poet and novelist, Rainer Maria Rilke who wrote in the late 19th and early 20th century was recognised as one of the most lyrically intense German poets. He wrote the words, 'The spring has returned. The earth is like a child that knows poems'. I include below one of the spring poems that I wrote to celebrate my wish to see spring return:

'If only one wish was granted to me': Copyright: William Forde

"If only one wish was granted to me,
to save spring meadows for all to see
would be my wish, my heart's desire
to see spectacular poppy fields fire
icy hearts, stagnant thoughts and sorry souls
back into life, where only Nature holds
within its ground, eternity.'

William Forde: March 18th, 2018.
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March 17th, 2018.

17/3/2018

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​Thought for today:
"On this glorious day of the 17th, March, as an Irish-born man who now lives in Haworth, I wish all my family and friends a very happy Saint Patrick's Day.

There were some disadvantages to being Irish as I grew up, but such were always greatly outweighed by the advantages I encountered. I don't why, but all the Irish seem to enjoy attending funerals. I've even known some travel five or ten miles just to have a good day out at the funeral of some stranger, followed by attending the reception and get together afterwards. I'll never forget the first Irish funeral I attended as a child and in particular, the words that the priest conducting the ceremony used to describe the man being buried.

As the coffin was lowered into the ground, the deceased was described as having been 'a saint, a scholar and a gentleman.' A large part of me regretted never having known this great man. Over the years that followed, I attended numerous Irish funerals. I was almost eleven years old before I realised that every Irish man I'd ever seen buried had been described by the priest conducting the burial as having been 'a saint, a scholar and a gentleman!' It would seem that these words can be purchased from the priest conducting every Irish funeral for a mere €20.

So there you have it, you English folk. All Irish men are born, live and die superior to other nationalities. Saint Patrick himself must have truly worked his miracles when he converted every man in dear old Ireland to saints, scholars and gentlemen. Isn't it just a shame that he did nothing to change the weird and wild ways of the Irish woman, who let me tell you, no English man will ever be able to tame and turn into an English lady.

The Irish have always been known for their pragmatism; their ability to blow with the wind, especially when they need to urinate on an open moorland on a windy day. Here is a little story to demonstrate this national trait:

THE IRISH PROSTITUTE

An Irish daughter had not been home for over five years. Upon her return, her father cursed her heavily.

'Where have ye been all this time, child? Why did ye not write to us, not even a line? Why didn't ye call? Can ye not understand what yer put ye poor old mother through?'

The girl, crying, replied, 'Da...I was scared to show my face in my hometown again...you see... I became a low-down dirty prostitute.'

'Ye what!? Get out a here, ye shameless harlot! Ye hussy, ye sinner! You're a disgrace to this Catholic family. Get out and never show your face 'round here again! You're no daughter of mine. Begone with ye!'

'OK, Da... as ye wish. I only came back to give Ma this luxurious fur coat, and a title deed to a ten-bedroom mansion; plus a five million euros savings certificate. For me little brother, I have this gold Rolex and for ye Da, who could never afford a car, there's the sparkling new Mercedes limited-edition convertible that's parked outside, plus a ten-year membership to the country club of your choice. I'd also like to extend an invitation for ye all to spend New Year's Eve on board my new yacht in the Riviera. Ye could have a cracking time and I'd make sure ye be back home for St Patrick's Day by first-class travel.'

'What was it ye said ye had become?' asked her father.

'A prostitute, Da!' the girl cries, 'A low-down dirty prostitute.'

'Oh! My Goodness! Ye scared me half to death, girl! I thought ye said a low-down dirty Protestant! Come here and give yer old Dad a hug. It's fair grand to see you again!"

Happy Saint Patrick's day to all my family and Facebook friends. Mine's a pint of Guinness!" : William Forde: March 17th, 2018.
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March 16th, 2018.

16/3/2018

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​Thought for today:
"Only a true Haworth resident will know that 'The Bronte Way' is no rambler's walk or bridal footpath in our fair land. We true stalwarts know that the phrase was born in the breast of a mother of thirteen children who was reported to have been born in a little cottage up Main Street during the 1830's.


It was she who first found 'The Bronte Way' after she discovered the best method of disciplining her young without needing to resort to the belt or birch. For a mother to be a good disciplinarian she must have the 'Bronte Look' and the 'Bronte Finger' as the residents of Haworth have come to know and she must also possess the skill to synchronise both perfectly.This is what has come to be known as 'The Bronte Way'.


If you don't believe me, wait until you next see a child about to break out into a tantrum in the Main Street. If they get a sharp clout, a smacked bottom or their ice cream cornet snatched from their hands in punishment and thrown away, then know them to be visitors.


If, on the other hand, however, instead of threatening them with any words or stick to hand, the mother simply looks them straight in the eye and points in 'The Bronte Way,' you know she hails from Haworth. I guarantee that the silent image will initially stop them in their tracks for a moment, which is usually enough time to regain control of the situation.

Where do you think that the late Barbara Woodhouse developed her successful approach in establishing dog obedience? Why, from Haworth of course!


As for Bronte women's way of keeping their husbands in check in the departments of drinking too much, having a wandering eye or even daring to have a mild dalliance with a loose married woman who has recently come into the area, there is the eternal threat of the 'Cullingworth Cleaver' which is hung within husbandly eyesight in every Bronte woman's kitchen. Every Bronte man knows that if he desires to remain a man and is to be one day buried with all his body parts which he had attached to his torso when he first entered this life, that drink in moderation, no fanciful notions of mind or deviation from marital vow is the order of the day." William Forde: March 16th, 2018.
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March 15th, 2018.

15/3/2018

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Thought for today:
"For twenty-five years I worked as Probation Officer specialising in areas of stress and fear reduction and anger management. Backing up all work in these areas was Relaxation Training.

Instead of looking at some of the more sophisticated procedures in helping these problem areas today, I would like to deal with the many simple things that anyone can/should do to not worry as much whatever it is they worry about.

So here are a few tips that I borrowed from the psychology shelf many years ago, have used constantly, and like the old library book never returned! These are things that worriers can instantly apply to their lives with significant benefit instantly accruing.

Worrying is like a rocking chair insomuch as it gives us something to do, but doesn't get us anywhere we want to go. Like a mother with a large brood who is constantly worrying where the next bite is going to come from, was she starting again, she would know from her own past experience that fewer chicks to look after should mean fewer worries to contend with. Why must we complicate our lives, when all that is required to prevent one worrying unnecessarily all day long is to keep it simple. Here are a few helpful tips I have found extremely valuable over the years in keeping our many problems fewer:

When missing someone, if possible, contact them by any means available.

​When wanting to go out with someone, invite them. They can, at worse, only say 'no' and could also say 'yes'.

When wanting to be understood, explain in statements of direct simplicity.

If you have a question that puzzles you, ask someone who might know the answer to tell you.

If you don't like what something or someone is saying or doing, say so and ask them to stop.

If you do like something they are saying or doing, let them know you like it.

If you love someone, tell them and show them.

If you feel a strong emotion, appropriately express it.

I have learned over the years that the precise words we speak command the corresponding attachment of an appropriate level of body energy to accompany them, that will either make it more or less likely for a specific action to happen. This energy level blends our intentions to our mental instructions, to which our body reacts.
For Example:
Saying 'I might' will produce a 'possible' outcome or may not, as the energy/determination level is set low.
Saying 'I will' is more likely to produce a 'probable' outcome as the energy/determination level is set higher.
Saying 'I shall' will most likely produce the 'definite' outcome you desire as the energy/determination level is set as high as can be.

Any addict who says 'I might stop' as opposed to 'I will stop' as opposed to 'I shall stop' has little chance of stopping, but saying they 'will stop' instructs to their brain to produce the corresponding level of body energy that is capable of making it possible for them to stop. However, saying 'I shall stop' will result in the brain instructing the body to produce the required amount of energy (ie determination) 'to stop'.

Think upon these simple rules the next time you decide to give up smoking, drinking or overeating etc etc. It really does matter whether you say, 'I might, I will or I shall', as where your body finishes up in action form shall be determined where your mind and mental instruction started off!

Keeping things easy enables life to go much smoother. It also helps if you don't have a dozen hungry young ones to look out for all day with no 'me time' in-between fetching and carrying!" William Forde: March 15th, 2018.
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March 14th, 2018

14/3/2018

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​
"Thought for today:
"When I was a young boy, my mother would say, 'Billy, you may never know what you want to be when you grow up, but whatever you turn out to be, I pray that you be content!' I learned very early on in my life that 'contentment' was the art of getting out of every situation all the good that there was in it. Being born the eldest of seven children into a family of materially poor circumstances taught me that the richest person isn't the one who has the most, but the one who comes to need the least. 

Sometimes when I complained that I didn't have the things that other boys had, my mother would remind me, 'Billy, you have much more. You have your loving family! When I die, I will leave you the greatest inheritance of all. You will have the knowledge that I always loved you and the legacy of your six brothers and sisters by your side. There is no greater treasure I can leave you, believe me.' She was so right.

Over the years that followed, my mother's words proved their weight in gold. I learned that however difficult life could get from time to time that I never felt alone. After I became a Probation Officer and saw people in their most torturous of circumstances, on subsequent occasions when I didn't get everything I wanted, I could at least be content with the fact that the things I didn't want, I didn't get either! These were things like depression, despair, destitution, disatisfaction in all I do, lack of confidence, feeling unloved and unwanted, being devoid of purpose or harbouring doubt in myself and the future!

The power of positive thinking taught me that nothing is either good or bad in this world that thinking it so, will not make it so! I also learned through positive thinking that I could always get what I wanted out of life once I learned to want what I got!


Finally, teachings from my religion along with teachings ascribed to the Buddha taught me that 'less is more' once I started to appreciate and accept that everything we possess that is not necessary to life or happiness has the potential to become a burden, and that a day rarely passes when we do not add to it. Therein lay the wealth of my inheritance and legacy that my mother and father left me when they died. Dad was a man who walked as proud as any other man and never looked up to or down on no other. Mum was a woman who often carried an empty purse, but had a heart filled with love and a mind stuffed with Irish wisdom that she gladly shared. Together, along with my six siblings, my family represents to me where I came from. My relationship with my loving wife, Sheila, represents the happiness cloud I've been floating inside for the past eight years since we first met, and my relationship with my God will keep me alive eternally in His house. " William Forde: March 14th, 2018.
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March 13th, 2018.

13/3/2018

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Thought for today:
"Oh shadow of saving sunlight, the window of my soul and instrument of my fate, fly me away from all earthly pain and distress and let me be enabled to look at life anew. Take me from the path of earthly danger and move me towards immortality in the heavens above. Let me settle on some distant moon and look down upon the earth below in all its radiant splendour as I gaze upon my past, but not yet for I still have much to do.


Was I to sit upon the moon and look down on all my earthy actions with total detachment, would the great, the good, the kind and the humane things I did for and towards others look as great, good, kind and humane from on high? Would I see that I did them for the benefit of myself as much as I did them to enhance the lives of others? Would I see that I liked being 'good' because it made me look 'good' in the eyes of others and thereby feel 'good' in myself? Was such a path I chose to walk paved with intentions of humility or martyrdom?


And would those things I did, and which at the time of their enactment seemed so wrong to do, be now judged as harshly as I once judged them? Were those battles I fought through a sense of righteous anger and the wars I engaged in between adversaries and attackers of my beliefs, family and country, really as wrong as I initially thought them to be?


Thank God it takes a God from on high to know the true difference between 'right' and 'wrong,' and the truth and falseness between 'consequence' and 'intent'. It was never meant for one man of this earth to stand in judgement over the deeds of another and to act as judge, jury and executioner. Neither was the earth designed to make half of the people on one side of its planet forever live in the shadow of the other half's brightness; placing some high and enabling them to look down on others.


All injustice shall one day be righted. Those who presently 'have not' shall 'have' and those whose life is spent looking up to others shall no longer need to elevate their gaze beyond their horizon.


I have often wondered if my lot in life had been to have been born the poorest of the poor in an underdeveloped and politically corrupt country, how would I have fared? Would my handicaps and social disadvantages have prevented me from 'finding me' and 'being me'? I'd like to think that material acquisitions, education levels, social position and group influence, or the lack of them, can never stop any person in any part of the world from finding themselves, discovering their purpose in life and becoming a good person in their dealings with others in the process of living their lives.


I must confess that while I've never had any conscious desire ever to look down on anyone, that sometimes by allowing oneself to be placed too high in another's esteem, can often lead others less worldly-able to feel more inferior than they might otherwise have felt, had they never known you in the first place!


I have often wondered why I found the 'Murder in the Cathedral' by T.S.Eliot a most captivating and thoughtful read. It is because the author poses one of life's conundrums that has always fascinated me. The book tells the story of the assassination of Archbishop Thomas Becket in Canterbury Cathedral in 1170, at the altar steps. Prior to his assassination, Thomas Becket gave his last sermon which referred to possible martyrdom for one's religion. He was, subsequently murdered in the Cathedral shortly after and was later canonised.


Many thought his final sermon to be too provocative for the King's barons at the time and invited/incited his own martyrdom. The question that T.S.Eliot's words posed in his dramatic play was, 'Is the greatest of all treason is to do the right deed for the wrong reason'.


My father was the most humble man I ever knew and his oldest son (myself) will clearly acknowledge the sin of 'Pride' as being the greatest of my sins and ironically, the least desirable side of my character traits. I cannot deny that there has always been a burning desire inside me to be the first, the best at anything and everything I do. The question which has always represented the conundrum of my life is, 'Why do I behave thus?' Do I do those things in my belief that my efforts will eventually 'pay off' on this earth? Or do I believe that if I remain a 'good person' I shall receive the just rewards for my efforts through my eventual entrance into Heaven and eternal happiness on the 'Day of Judgement?' And, is one of these motives any less/more worthy than the other?


I know in my heart of hearts that the only way any person can escape this greatest of life's conundrums is to consciously and unconsciously do the right thing in any set of circumstances without fear or favour, for no other reason than to believe it to be the right thing to do!' If there is a Heaven, therefore, do not all followers of a God who do good throughout their lives, start off with less chance of ever arriving at the Pearly Gates than any agnostic who lives their life doing the right thing for no other reason than they believe it to be the right thing to do? " William Forde, March 13th, 2018.
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March 12th, 2018

12/3/2018

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Thought for today:
"We may curse those we hate (including self) a thousand times, yet only need to forgive once; for when we believe it can happen, it will happen, and when we find it satisfactorily done, we will have spent our goodness doing it. Our love, our compassion, our forgiveness is but mere ornament until it is given life and is shared with another. Only when we set sail from the 'Land of Selfishness' can we ever hope to discover a more wonderful world, a 'Land of Hope'.

'Love isn't Loving until Shared' by William Forde


Love isn't loving until shared.
Fear becomes boldness when it's dared.
Time has no meaning until spent.
Forgiveness is stuck 'til you relent.


Use your compassion to undo wrong.
Use your talents to sing your song.
Hold tight each moment of your dreams.
Nothing is ever what it seems.


Love brings with it infinite joy,
when every searching heart finds home
and every girl discovers boy.
Matching love waiting to be found,
in empty throne, your heart is crowned.


William Forde: Copyright: March 12th, 2018.
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March 11th, 2018

11/3/2018

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Thought for today:
"Today is Mother's Day, and Sheila and I remember fondly the mothers we lost, Maureen Forde and Elizabeth Williams. Although brought up at opposite sides of the world, and although their material experiences were vastly different (Mother Elizabeth being a barrister and mum to two children, and Mother Maureen being a mother of seven and a part-time waitress), in most other character respects our two mums were very similar.

Each of our mothers loved music and song and both were religious and generous to a fault. Each woman wore a smile across their face from dawn until dusk, and which lasted from cradle to grave, and neither ever had a bad word to say about any other person. Mother Forde was always dreaming about 'far away places,' and being Irish, she always dreamt of the land of her birth. Indeed, her favourite song was 'Faraway Places' sung by her favourite singer, Vera Lynn; the Forces Sweetheart.

Mother Elizabeth loved visiting the Holy Land in her earlier years and particularly seeing the 'Sea of Galilee'. Mother Elizabeth's dream was visiting the 'Sea of Galilee' again. In her last five years of life, her eyesight started to fail until the time came when it went completely, and apart from seeing vague outlines, she was effectively blind. Although she could have had her eyesight corrected by having her cataracts removed, she refused. I think she wanted her world to look in her eyes as it had always looked. On a summer's day, Mother Elizabeth, Sheila and I, and our dog Lady would go for a walk along the top of Cemetery Road in Haworth. We would walk about half a mile and finish up looking down at 'Sladen Reservoir' in the distance. She would call the reservoir the 'Sea of Galilee'. Like the Prophet Mohammed, when He could not go to the mountain, he is said to have brought the mountain to him. Likewise, Mother Elizabeth obviously took a sheet out of the Prophet Mohammed's book by bringing the 'Sea of Galilee' to herself when she no longer possessed the physical means to visit it herself!

A happy Mother's Day from your children Billy and Sheila, Mother Forde and Mother Williams. We are sure that you each have reserved your favourite spot in heaven, and as you never met each other when you were alive, why not look each other up now, as Sheila and I just know that you'll get on like a house on fire. We have included Mum Forde's favourite song that will enable you both to look down on us today. xxxxxx" Love from your children, Billy, Mary, Eileen, Patrick, Peter, Michael , Susan; and Sheila and Winston: March 11th, 2018.
https://youtu.be/Y5RhWVlXF0Q



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March 10th, 2018

10/3/2018

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​Thought for today:
"Yesterday, was the first opportunity I had to see and hold my granddaughter, Olivia Paige Forde. I am so pleased that my life circumstances afforded me this opportunity to introduce myself to the latest addition into the Forde Family, of which I hold the honour of being its oldest member and effectively, 'The Godfather' and 'Protector' of my parent's priceless legacy. That legacy was six siblings, along with the knowledge that mum told us stories every day. Never one day started or ended without my mother telling me that 'I was special' and that 'she loved me'. These are three things I would advise Olivia's parents to do to ensure that their daughter grows up happy, feeling wanted and able to take on the world when her time of majority arrives. They will prove essential when the day comes that she has to take the bull by the horns and lead others her way.


While it is an almost certainty, Olivia Paige, that I will probably miss most of the major landmarks in your development, the special book I recently wrote to celebrate your birth will always enable you to remember this old granddad you never knew fondly during your adult years.


Were I ever to give a young girl like you, Olivia Paige, who faces growing up in today's world one single piece of advice, it wouldn't be how to get a sound education, secure a good job, marry a rich man, good man, handsome man, or how to remain attractive of face, open of heart, sensitive of soul or forgiving of spirit.


Though these and many more things are undoubted of great importance to any young girl who hasn't yet started to walk, talk or is yet able to wipe one's own bottom, they are not the most important in your character building over the years ahead!


You are only ten days old and cannot possibly know the unfairness that still exists between the genders in this man-made-world you will one day try to enter on equal terms, and none of the previously mentioned traits, will of themselves, enable you to survive as a bold, confident and independent person with self-respect and peace of mind.


Was I to offer such a girl as my youngest granddaughter but one solid piece of advice it would be, 'Never consider any person or creature to be more important than yourself or more awesome in their art of power and persuasion. Don't be intimidated by life; Don't fall into the comfortable role of 'follower'; you lead it and don't let it lead you! Face all adversity as though the answer alone lies in your hands, as does your fate, but never be afraid to take the help of others when needed. Be guided by your parents by all means, without ever making the mistake that because they are your parents, they will always know everything that is right for you. They are only fallible and can do wrong as all adults can and sometimes do. When the time arrives that you feel intimate love for another, if it is right for you, it will declare and prove itself whatever difficulty it faces.Know and be accepting of all your family and friends around you, but also know that you can never know and accept them well enough until you come to know and accept yourself.'


It is only when young girls have the fullest opportunities to become women, and who are confident enough in self to take the lead in this world, that society will start to move forward instead of forever standing still and looking back. One day, the march of progress will move farther along. It started with the Suffragettes, it recently found a new identity in the 'Me Too' movement, and hopefully, it will find added expression in the future; in yourself! Olivia Paige, today you are the future; so it is my most earnest desire that the progression of female rights find expression in you and the life you will one day live. Until that day arrives when neither man nor woman receives greater or lesser advantage in all their dealings with our world because of their sex, true equality between the sexes will exist in name only!


Never forget Olivia Paige Forde that your old Granddad Forde loves you dearly, as do your parents and siblings and Grandparents Granger and Grandmother Forde. God bless you and all your family." William Forde: March 10th, 2018.
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March 9th, 2018

9/3/2018

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​Thought for today:
'My thought today is a prayer that I composed years ago to help maintain my focus on what really matters in life to becoming and remaining as good a person to humanity as one can be. For those who may not believe in there being a God, the ideas and personal entreaties I mention are still relevant for the contentment of both mind and body.

Dear God, I accept that the good actions of all people will always count more in the Bank of Heaven and pay higher dividends than any material gain in any other human dealings in the material marketplace.

Oh father of all forlorn hope, rescue me from earthly despair and eternal damnation. Save me from my inner greed and need to surround myself with all things comfortable while others live in penury and on starvation rations.

Allow not my memory to be conveniently washed away like water down a drain, but instead endow and cleanse my mind and body with the knowledge and compassion that I can truly love and care for those I never knew; and in doing so, I may help them to live better lives so that they too can know satisfaction and help others when they hold a more advantageous position.

Dear Lord, please let fade in thy reckoning all of those years I lived life to the full, enabling my own happiness to suppress greater awareness of world want while spending lavishly and foolishly upon things that didn't matter when such precious monies could have rescued so much more and saved the lives of many who are now dead or still go hungry and in daily want.

Had I acted better, I might have rescued some parentless children, ill-treated pets, limbless beggars, confirmed addicts, innumerable homeless, a few of the world's starving, tortured and abused. All of this I might have done if only I'd given more of myself and my purse and less of my insensitivity, disdain, disrespectful thoughts and xenophobic values.

If only I'd spoken out instead of staying quiet while wrapped in my own blanket of consensual comfort? If only I'd acted more boldly instead of standing idly by when the meek were mocked and the weak beaten down farther? If only I'd been a braver person and had tried to stop injustice whenever I came across it instead of looking away when the mob shouted louder? Had I acted thus, fewer injustices might have taken place in my presence and another would have known that they were not alone!

If only I'd done those things, I could have truly rescued so much more, and in the saving of others, saved myself!" William Forde: March 9th, 2018.
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March 8th, 2018

8/3/2018

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Thought for today:
"The secret of any lasting love union is to let there be space between your togetherness. Constant companionship may be fine for Siamese twins, but never for individuals of independent mind. There are times when we all need to be alone and there are also times when we are alone 'together' gathering our thoughts." March 8th, 2018.
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March 7th, 2018

7/3/2018

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"Soon, spring will be upon us once more, enabling so many memories, dreams and aspirations to be reborn. This poem was inspired by a single line I once read that was written by the American author and naturalist, Hal Borland, who died in 1978, when he said, 'No winter lasts forever, no spring skips its turn.'


'Bluebell Wood' by William Forde.

'Enchanted woodland of the spring
bring magic carpet on thy wing.
Crown grass and trees in ground of blue,
smell sweet aroma of morning dew.
Grow wild the flowers amid the trees,
and let birds sing within cool breeze.

Make this new spring my first new spring,
show astonishment in everything.
Where buds do not forget to bloom
and bluebells carpet Nature's room.
Where butterflies flit and flutter
​and dandelions turn chins to butter.

Know this as being Nature's balm,
restore new life to winter's calm.
Oh, let no winter last forever,
and let no springtime miss its turn.
Let the spring of lovers blossom,
oh,let the flame of sweet love burn.'

Life is precious and life's so good
enjoy it more in Bluebell Wood.'


William Forde: Copyright March 7th, 2018.
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