Thought for today:
"What is it that gets you fed up, good and proper? Everyone knows that something is very wrong when a child looks bored and fed up with life, but adults are often expected to grin and bear it and put on a good face for public consumption whatever their underlying problems are.
As a person who can honestly say that I have never known a minute of boredom in my life and because I believe that 'being bored' is more of a 'learned behaviour' as opposed to a 'genetic condition', I may have a few healthy suggestions for people who suffer from this malaise and who are literally fed up with always feeling fed up!
While being 'bored' and being 'fed up' tend to be interchangeable adjectives in the English language and common meaning, they are entirely different things. Whereas to 'be bored' is to lack interest in one's current activity/inactivity 'being fed up' essentially involves that feeling of being unable or unwilling to put up with something any longer. In this respect, whilst being bored can be easily remedied by busying oneself with more interesting activities, being fed up invariably contains a determination to do something about the underlying cause.
Imagine being bored of your relationship with your girlfriend or boyfriend. In this instance, you may like what you have, but not necessarily with them. However, take the most common fed-up statement of all, 'I'm fed up of being taken for granted!' That statement is the kind that tells someone that things are about to change.
I am pretty sure in my own mind that the reason I am never bored is simply because I've always been busy all of my life. I am also sure that the reason I never get fed up is because it is a part of my response pattern to do something about things I do not like in my life. One of the greatest and healthiest of all examples my dear mother gave me was to express my feelings at the moment of their birth and not repress them. She used to say, 'Billy, I hate fighting, but I hate holding my feelings in even more.'
Over forty years of work as a Probation Officer, Group Worker, Relaxation Trainer, Cognitive Behaviourist and Stress/Anger Management Consultant led me to believe that the behaviour of constantly being 'fed up' is the gateway to long term depression and some form of emotional disturbance. There is at the end of the day only so much a person can take before they inappropriately act by harming someone else or themselves; unless of course 'they do something positive' about it themselves.
I have met many people who were fed up with being bullied, numerous folk fed up of giving their all to everyone they love and then getting dumped and too many folk who were sick to the back teeth of always being taken advantage of etc. etc.
The biggest problem is knowing when you're expressing, 'I've had enough' and 'I can't stand it', besides understanding the significant difference between the two. Whereas 'I've had enough' contains that determined element and invariably goes on to mean, 'and therefore I intend to do something about it to positively change the situation', the expression, 'I can't stand it' is the most untruthful and unhealthy belief that the body can hold.
When we say the words, 'I can't stand it,' we are effectively instructing our body 'not to stand it.' This is a blatent lie as we can stand anything in the world until our very last breath of life is squeezed from our lungs; then it's arguably not us who is standing it, but our corpse.
The real danger of telling ourselves this drivel is that when we foolishly believe that we cannot stand a situation and leave it, we then take 'I can't stand it' into the next relationship or situation we enter and the one after that and so on. Hence the pattern for one person seemingly experiencing the same situation over again is because they continue repeating the very same mistaken behaviour and applying the same irrational beliefs. In this manner, they do not have repeat situations, but the same situation over and over again, because they carry it around with them inside their mind, body and belief system!
Self talk is something we all do and in doing so, we invariably instruct our bodies to respond accordingly. So recognising 'self talk' as part of our natural body functioning, we'd be wiser to choose our words to ourself very carefully in future. Never forget that the very worse statement we can tell ourselves is the lie, 'I can't stand it!'
Saying, 'I won't put up with this situation any longer' is much healthier. Do this and you will never get fed up again. You may get bored as we all are prone to from time to time, but then do something else that is more interesting and that state of being will also pass." William Forde: March 2nd, 2015.
"What is it that gets you fed up, good and proper? Everyone knows that something is very wrong when a child looks bored and fed up with life, but adults are often expected to grin and bear it and put on a good face for public consumption whatever their underlying problems are.
As a person who can honestly say that I have never known a minute of boredom in my life and because I believe that 'being bored' is more of a 'learned behaviour' as opposed to a 'genetic condition', I may have a few healthy suggestions for people who suffer from this malaise and who are literally fed up with always feeling fed up!
While being 'bored' and being 'fed up' tend to be interchangeable adjectives in the English language and common meaning, they are entirely different things. Whereas to 'be bored' is to lack interest in one's current activity/inactivity 'being fed up' essentially involves that feeling of being unable or unwilling to put up with something any longer. In this respect, whilst being bored can be easily remedied by busying oneself with more interesting activities, being fed up invariably contains a determination to do something about the underlying cause.
Imagine being bored of your relationship with your girlfriend or boyfriend. In this instance, you may like what you have, but not necessarily with them. However, take the most common fed-up statement of all, 'I'm fed up of being taken for granted!' That statement is the kind that tells someone that things are about to change.
I am pretty sure in my own mind that the reason I am never bored is simply because I've always been busy all of my life. I am also sure that the reason I never get fed up is because it is a part of my response pattern to do something about things I do not like in my life. One of the greatest and healthiest of all examples my dear mother gave me was to express my feelings at the moment of their birth and not repress them. She used to say, 'Billy, I hate fighting, but I hate holding my feelings in even more.'
Over forty years of work as a Probation Officer, Group Worker, Relaxation Trainer, Cognitive Behaviourist and Stress/Anger Management Consultant led me to believe that the behaviour of constantly being 'fed up' is the gateway to long term depression and some form of emotional disturbance. There is at the end of the day only so much a person can take before they inappropriately act by harming someone else or themselves; unless of course 'they do something positive' about it themselves.
I have met many people who were fed up with being bullied, numerous folk fed up of giving their all to everyone they love and then getting dumped and too many folk who were sick to the back teeth of always being taken advantage of etc. etc.
The biggest problem is knowing when you're expressing, 'I've had enough' and 'I can't stand it', besides understanding the significant difference between the two. Whereas 'I've had enough' contains that determined element and invariably goes on to mean, 'and therefore I intend to do something about it to positively change the situation', the expression, 'I can't stand it' is the most untruthful and unhealthy belief that the body can hold.
When we say the words, 'I can't stand it,' we are effectively instructing our body 'not to stand it.' This is a blatent lie as we can stand anything in the world until our very last breath of life is squeezed from our lungs; then it's arguably not us who is standing it, but our corpse.
The real danger of telling ourselves this drivel is that when we foolishly believe that we cannot stand a situation and leave it, we then take 'I can't stand it' into the next relationship or situation we enter and the one after that and so on. Hence the pattern for one person seemingly experiencing the same situation over again is because they continue repeating the very same mistaken behaviour and applying the same irrational beliefs. In this manner, they do not have repeat situations, but the same situation over and over again, because they carry it around with them inside their mind, body and belief system!
Self talk is something we all do and in doing so, we invariably instruct our bodies to respond accordingly. So recognising 'self talk' as part of our natural body functioning, we'd be wiser to choose our words to ourself very carefully in future. Never forget that the very worse statement we can tell ourselves is the lie, 'I can't stand it!'
Saying, 'I won't put up with this situation any longer' is much healthier. Do this and you will never get fed up again. You may get bored as we all are prone to from time to time, but then do something else that is more interesting and that state of being will also pass." William Forde: March 2nd, 2015.
