"True happiness lies within the soul and is never without the body. It cannot be touched, yet is felt by all whom it touches. It enables one to live a lifetime in one moment of being, providing they hold open expectation to all that is possible. It is found in freedom and fulfilment, and we achieve it when we squander ourselves for no other purpose than to be beneficial to others.
True happiness cannot exist in splendid isolation: it requires to be shared with others in order to grow. It has to be released from self if it is to touch the lives of others. There would be no point in a heaven where no one else but God allowed entry to that place. The same is true of happiness and compassion of the heart. I once believed that happiness originated from having something you wanted that pleased you exceedingly, but then learned that it resides not in the material world but holds audience only in one's 'state of mind'.
Happiness can be partial or complete and depends on what type of person you have become during your travel through life and how you have applied yourself and your talents in the service of others. To know complete happiness, you must turn in perfect synchronisation with the world on its axis of love, as you cannot help others if you are unable to help yourself. One of the world's greatest truths is that you can never know others until you know yourself!
Finding what wavelength others operate on when in your presence becomes an essential ingredient towards effective communication and greater understanding of your fellow man. Before you are able to find that wavelength, you must first find self and become friendly and accepting of your own attitudes, values, beliefs and disposition.
As a past therapist and stress management worker for thirty years, I frequently worked with many people who had little or no sense of personal identity. Had I been the more flippant type of worker, I could have advised them, 'If you feel you have no identity and don't know who you are, and would dearly love to be someone else, then go to any busy airport arrival lounge in the country where you will find dozens of waiting cardholders with suggestions!'
Never having taken 'the absence of personal identity' lightly though, and knowing how harmful and demoralising this problem can be, believe me, that flippancy is the worst type of response that will improve the situation. I would seriously advise anyone in search of establishing an identity that serves them well, makes them happy and popular, is seen as offering good companionship, and whose views and advice is highly valued and considered purposeful, to do the following:
First: Get to like your own name; the name your parents thought long and hard about before they gave you it. Believe me, it wasn't picked out of a hat! Look in a mirror at the start and end of each day and reinforce your liking of both the image you see and the name of the person before you, and repeat after me, 'I like the person I see. I like...(insert name here). I am a person of worth'.
Second: Learn to smile each time you are introduced to a new person or an old friend; especially a budding girlfriend/boyfriend or spouse-to-be (unless of course, you are an undertaker at work or a person communicating the loss of life or limb, or the presence of a life-threatening illness).
Three: Learn to laugh at yourself and life in general, but never at the misfortune of others. Life is too short an earthly experience to drown it in serious thought/action all the time. Why do you think puddles were created if they weren't for jumping in from time to time?
Four: Be honest in your word, generous in spirit, positive in attitude, loyal and faithful in your dealings with all others, and compassionate and forgiving in your disposition. If you can be these things and be yourself at every opportunity, you will receive as much happiness and satisfaction with life that you can take on board.
Follow Forde's 'Four Pillars of Wisdom' that my mother taught me by her words and example in the selfless life she led on earth, and it doesn't matter which religious denomination you do or don't follow; you'll be able to walk through life in the knowledge that your God walks alongside you, and should you tire along your journey, He will carry you onward to your ultimate destination; heaven". William Forde: February 13th, 2018.